All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.

21-09-2011

Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31

The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air. The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover : "Can't you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!"

The boy replies back : "Darling, I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors."

First man: "You know, I hear Microsoft is going to start making Condoms."
Second man: "That gives a whole new meaning to the words, 'General Protection Fault.'"

The software engineering field is staffed primarily by men; the ratio of male to female software engineers is on the order of 15 to 1. This makes it pretty easy for women to find potential mates among their peers. However, software types have a well-earned reputation for being... a little strange.
While discussing the prospect of working in the software industry, one woman commented to another: "The odds are good, but the goods are odd."

Would you like to buy a second-hand computer? I'm afraid not. I'm only able to type with one hand as it is.

A technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer put the disk in, asked the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and closing the door to his room.

They say that the new super computer knows everything. A skeptical man came and asked the computer, "Where is my father?"
The computer bleeped for a short while, and then came back with "Your father is fishing in Michigan."
The skeptical man said triumphantly, "You see? I knew this was nonsense. My father has been dead for twenty years."
"No", replied the super computer immediately. "Your mother's husband has been dead for twenty years. Your father just landed a three pound trout."